The Bachelorette Life: Self-Care

A modern bachelorette should value three things: her mind, body, and spirit. Taking great care of those three things not only brings improvement but can make you feel good and attractive to others. Attraction is an inside job first, and once you do the work, it’s amazing how others start to take notice. I’m always reading, writing, learning new skills, committing to a fitness routine, watching what I eat, and making sure I set aside quiet time with the Lord. Committing to those things on a regular basis isn’t easy but it feels good investing in me. No one will love me the way I do and no one will love you the way you love yourself. Self-care is critical these days, especially in a day and time where so many people, especially women, are putting their self-worth into people and things that will ultimately let them down or worse, not valuing themselves at all. If no one ever tells you, I’m telling you, that you have value. Even if you don’t recognize it, you do. We all do. This year I’ve been intentional about focusing on bettering myself, liking myself, and falling in love with myself. And each time I look in the mirror, pray, finish a workout, face a challenge, come up with a new writing idea, or celebrate a minor or major accomplishment, I fall more in like/love with myself in ways I didn’t imagine. The same can happen for you too. I’m cheering you on. You go, girl. And if you’re single, whether by choice, a breakup, separation, or divorce and especially if you’re a Christian woman navigating your singleness, perhaps you’ll find some inspiration in some of the content below:

The Bachelorette Life

The Bachelorette Life: Bae Watch

The Bachelorette Life: Save-The-Date

The bachelorette life, this summer, and of course God, have been very good to me. I’m the happiest I’ve been in a while and I can’t wait to share more of my journey navigating the bachelorette life with you all. Stay tuned… J

The Day I Became A Kidney Donor

About a year ago, I had a dream my dad wanted to talk to our family about something serious. I wasn’t sure what he wanted to discuss, but I knew it was something I needed to prepare myself for. Around the time after I had this dream, I remember stopping by my parents place and sensing something was going on that they weren’t telling me. I tried to dismiss what I’d been feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. Something serious was happening. As I returned to my home after visiting them one day, I was in my kitchen washing dishes when a heaviness hit my heart like nothing I’d ever felt before. Something’s wrong with dad. That’s what that dream was about. God, what’s going on? As I continued washing dishes, I started crying and praying. Then in mid-spring, my dad held an unexpected family meeting that would change all our lives forever. He hesitated at first, and as his voice started cracking and he started crying, he said, “Well, I wanted to talk to ya’ll to tell you that I have kidney disea...

I’m Glad I’m Not Married

When I was about five years old, I was sitting in the backseat of my dad’s car when me, him, my older cousin (my aunt’s son), and my aunt (my dad’s sister) caught my aunt’s fiancé with another woman. My dad had been driving my aunt out to run some errands since she didn’t have a driver’s license or a car. When she spotted her man with another woman, she told my dad to pull the car over, got out of the car, and immediately addressed him. She wanted the keys back to her apartment and was done with him. The other woman she caught her fiancé with slapped him when she realized what was happening, and that was that. When my aunt returned to the car, she was clearly and understandably upset, and the ride back to her place was quiet. Although I was too young to fully grasp what was happening at the time, I knew it wasn’t good. And now, at 34 years old, I can’t imagine how much pain she was in. Her wedding had been planned and paid for – and she never made it down the aisle. My aunt was a beaut...

Dear Young Black Professionals

As you embark on your career, I want you to know some things and stay woke about what you’ll be up against. Please understand that no matter what, you have value, and you matter. Always remember that. As progressive as this world and different workplaces may seem, every workplace has a culture. You’ll be in different places where a lot of people who don’t look like you will be in the room. But know that you belong in those rooms too. Spend some time observing and studying those spaces and learn as much as you can. There will be people you work with who will make presumptions about your competence, education, and ability to fulfill your job duties. There will be more who will think less of you because of the color of your skin and try to disqualify you the moment you make an error, mistake, or ask questions about things you may not understand. This will all feel uncomfortable and you may get insecure, feel like you’re all by yourself, and think you don’t belong there, but ride it out...

Making Waves