The Bachelorette Life: Self-Care

A modern bachelorette should value three things: her mind, body, and spirit. Taking great care of those three things not only brings improvement but can make you feel good and attractive to others. Attraction is an inside job first, and once you do the work, it’s amazing how others start to take notice. I’m always reading, writing, learning new skills, committing to a fitness routine, watching what I eat, and making sure I set aside quiet time with the Lord. Committing to those things on a regular basis isn’t easy but it feels good investing in me. No one will love me the way I do and no one will love you the way you love yourself. Self-care is critical these days, especially in a day and time where so many people, especially women, are putting their self-worth into people and things that will ultimately let them down or worse, not valuing themselves at all. If no one ever tells you, I’m telling you, that you have value. Even if you don’t recognize it, you do. We all do. This year I’ve been intentional about focusing on bettering myself, liking myself, and falling in love with myself. And each time I look in the mirror, pray, finish a workout, face a challenge, come up with a new writing idea, or celebrate a minor or major accomplishment, I fall more in like/love with myself in ways I didn’t imagine. The same can happen for you too. I’m cheering you on. You go, girl. And if you’re single, whether by choice, a breakup, separation, or divorce and especially if you’re a Christian woman navigating your singleness, perhaps you’ll find some inspiration in some of the content below:

The Bachelorette Life

The Bachelorette Life: Bae Watch

The Bachelorette Life: Save-The-Date

The bachelorette life, this summer, and of course God, have been very good to me. I’m the happiest I’ve been in a while and I can’t wait to share more of my journey navigating the bachelorette life with you all. Stay tuned… J

Thoughts From a Black Educator: Qualified, Credentialed, and Constantly Undermined

I’m a Black educator in my fifth year of teaching middle school English, and in my third as the 8th Grade English PLC (Professional Learning Community) Lead. And while I genuinely enjoy the purposeful work I get to do, seeing the growth of my scholars, and continuing to hone my skills in a content area I’ve loved since I was a little girl, I’ve had to confront some unpleasant experiences in this space. I’d been through much worse when I was an academic advisor at a Christian university. Racism, sexism, harassment, and workplace bullying were sadly norms in that environment. However, some of what I’ve experienced as a Black educator hasn’t been normal … It doesn’t seem normal to be the only Black educator in my department – in a predominantly Black school. One of my Black colleagues once said, “It should look like a Tyler Perry movie in here.” But it doesn’t. It didn’t feel normal being reprimanded in a meeting (during my second year of teaching) by an administrator who went in on...

The Day I Made A Will

When I was a teenager, I remember writing a list of my greatest fears. One of the things I listed was death. Looking back, it was an interesting item to list because inevitably, death is something each of us will face at some point in our lives. Even though it’s no longer a fear of mine, I understand why and how it’s not a comfortable thing for everyone to navigate. But regardless, this past summer I completed a detailed will. I signed it, had witnesses sign it, and got it notarized. As I was getting everything done, one of the witnesses looked at me and said, “You know, it’s just that you’re so young…” I’ve learned that death doesn’t care how young or how old you are. You can be five, fifteen, thirty, or fifty, and it’s still something that happens. Completing my will wasn’t scary. It gave me peace of mind having documentation in place stating my detailed directives and requests. A year ago, I had one of my kidneys removed. It was a surgery that came with risks that were presented cle...

Stop Saying Stupid Stuff To People Who Are Childless

I’m convinced that many people don’t think before they speak. Especially when it comes to interacting with people who don’t have children. Normally, I’ve held my peace with this and felt the need to solely address women when it comes to this topic, but lately this is a message that men can benefit from too. Stop saying stupid stuff to people who don’t have children . I know this might be a difficult task for those of you who are nosey, have concerns that have nothing to do with you, or may be unhappy in your own life, but stop with the questions, jokes, and reckless comments. Even if you believe you’re being funny, making conversation, or coming from a genuine place, you’re honestly out of line. Because someone not having children and why is none of your business. I don’t have children, and I honestly don’t know if I will, but as a woman, I’m good with my life either way. I’ll always be grateful for what I have instead of lamenting about what I don’t. Which is probably why getting olde...

Making Waves