Making Waves

When I was in my twenties, I'd practically have a meltdown anytime I felt my position at work was being threatened.  Whether it was by way of budget cuts, a bad performance review from an unhinged manager, or a toxic work environment, thoughts of being written up and reprimanded, humiliated, and unemployed terrified me. My fears were often rooted in no longer having an income and losing everything that mattered to me – and sometimes my mind would go as far as wondering,  what if I get fired?    So whenever I made a mistake, or a manager expressed I wasn’t doing a good job, or that I was no longer a good fit, or would go as far as sending emails and write ups about me to higher ups, I’d panic, go home and cry, and try to figure out ways to change everyone’s minds about their perceptions of me and my work performance. Sounds exhausting, right? Trying to be a people pleaser is utterly draining and so not worth the energy. Trust me. And whenever my attempts failed (which they often did