Making Waves

It’s wild what some of us run away from in life. I know I’ve run away from lots of things. The funny thing about running is that many times, you may end up running right into the very things you’re trying to run away from. I’ve consistently run away from things like… My callings. My fears. And my truths. At one point I got really good at running and hiding out from a lot of these things, until I kept finding myself in situations where I was forced to embrace my callings, even when I was uncomfortable and unsure of myself, or step into leadership roles when I wanted to be the kind of girl that faded to the background and be left alone, or when I had to face my fears no matter who or what those fears may have looked like. I’ve also had to look into some truths about myself and different people I’ve come to know, and last but not least I’ve had to face and go head to head with Goliath like opposition that most people would never dare to step to. And in the midst of all this I...

One of my favorite movies is  Office Space . It’s absolutely hilarious but since I’ve officially joined the 9-5 working world, in a lot of ways, I now find Office Space to be strangely relatable. I don’t want to spoil the movie for anyone that hasn’t seen it but if you have, you likely know what the movie is about and why the main character, Peter Gibbons, is a very funny yet unenthusiastic employee who dares to challenge the conventions of the 9-5 life. The movie is pure, comedic genius. I enjoy working in an office, having an excuse to slay in business casual attire, and being employed. It’s a blessing. And while I have had jobs I didn’t necessarily like, I was able to learn something from all of them, which is a blessing too. If you watch Office Space you may be able to gather more of what I’m talking about, and observe some of the highs and lows of being part of the professional working world, but I’m certain you’ll get a good laugh from it all as well. Check it out sometime....

If ever there was a time this country needed Olivia Pope (and obviously Jesus) it’s now. If you’re not familiar with Olivia Pope, she’s a fictional character on Shonda Rhimes hit series  Scandal . Olivia is a complicated yet smart, beautiful, gutsy, and determined go-getter that fixes any and every crisis that goes down in Washington. So, I imagined what I’d write to Olivia Pope to enlist her services to handle things, and it’d probably go a little something like this: Dear Olivia Pope, I don’t know where to begin. Things have been a mess and I’m reaching out because the struggle has been too real. As I’m sure you’ve seen in the press, and perhaps a little before last November things have been super out of control. This country’s got enemies in and outside of the area, massive amounts of hate, in addition to inequality and division like never before, and all hell feels like its breaking loose. Lately, I’ve also found myself in a situation that’s been uncomfortable, and it’s...

I’ve often sat with the question, who are my real friends, Lord? I have about two confidants, and many constituents and comrades. Being able to recognize the differences between the confidants, constituents, and comrades in my life is something that has served me well, and making the mistake of confusing the three have been the  source of some of my biggest heartbreaks. I learned of these three categories after listening to a sermon from T.D. Jakes about being grounded in friendships. In his sermon he mentioned the importance of knowing the differences between confidants, constituents, and comrades in life. I also remember reading about them in his book, Destiny . I got a refresher course on the topic, and also took the time to take some much needed inventory on different people in my own life. In his sermon, T.D. Jakes said something I’ll never forget. He said, “You have all three (confidants, constituents, and comrades) but woe be unto you if you get them confused.”  Please...

Your shorts are too short. Your dress is too short. That blouse is too revealing. That dress is inappropriate. You have a two-piece bathing suit? Sinner. Along with wincing stares and stare downs. Ugh.  So, I’ve been pulled over by the fashion police one too many times, and with each prudish, judgmental, and sometimes, downright offensive comment, I’ve managed to bounce back and get on with my life just fine. As a woman on the receiving end of this, I do wonder do some people not have anything better to do than to be worried about what I’m wearing? That said, I’m taking a stand for all woman kind, and especially any and all Christian women who’ve ever found themselves in a similar situation. I will be their voice. I like clothes. I also love looking nice, and I believe fashion is a great way to express one’s self. As a believer, I do have boundaries but the thing is, being criticized for how I dress and worst of all, judged, is unsettling at times.  First...

One day I got to thinking about what it means to be a leading lady. Leading lady is a term usually referring to an actress who has the starring and/or lead role in a film or production. In reality, I’ve discovered I’m very much the leading lady in my own life. I have no Hollywood or fame-like aspirations, but when I think about how some of the more non-scandalous actresses in the world carry themselves, on and off-screen, it has inspired and made me examine what it means to be the leading lady in my biggest starring role yet – life . I’ve learned some things I want to share that I’ve gleaned from other leading ladies, and have now implemented in my own life.  I’ve learned… To Put/Keep God First – If you’re a leading lady, I believe this is something that’s necessary. If you put and keep God front and center of everything you do, you’re setting yourself up to be blessed. I’ve seen what can happen when I’ve gotten arrogant or acted like my way of doing things was better, only ...

It’s baffling how so many people don’t know how to give a proper apology. Everyone messes up but when you make a mistake, do something wrong (and know or at least sense you’re wrong), owning it and apologizing the right way can make a difference. People will do all kinds of things in place of saying sorry. They might… Be kind just to feel you out, even if they know something is up. Pretend nothing ever happened. Shower you with gifts or other meaningful gestures. Say “my bad” and wear it out so many times to the point where it gets annoying. Or say something like, “If I did or said something that hurt you, I’m sorry…” (this is seriously one of the weakest apologies ever. If you sense you did or said something that hurt someone, try coming with a better approach.) Examples of better and/or right ways to apologize? “I’d like to apologize for...” “I’m sorry for…” I understand that pride and ego can get in the way of giving a proper apology, but being the kind of p...

I have haters. It’s odd but I guess I’d better get used to dealing with them if I plan to keep winning. What’s interesting about all this is I’ve never considered myself the kind of person that would have haters. I mean, I already know   I’m blessed, gifted, smart, beautiful (both inside and out), and not to mention so, so dope lol but the fact that anyone would find me intimidating or threatening is always a surprise to me. It’s intriguing to embody that level of power. Since I have it though, might as well learn how to wield it. Jealousy is an even more complicated thing I never imagined being up against. Crazy as it seems, I do have people in my life that at some point, have been or either are jealous of me, and it’s awful. Jealousy is cruel . Now, before I go on, I’m not having a Mean Girls, Gretchen Wieners moment thinking, I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me, but I can’t help it that I’m popular . I’m not popular.  It’s nothing like that, but dealing with ha...

One of the biggest excuses I’ve heard as to why people believe they can’t accomplish something is, I can’t do that at my age. I think it’s bogus, and a huge band-aid for why some people don’t do a lot of the things they could be doing to better themselves. I used to think if something didn’t happen at the age I thought it would, then I missed my window of opportunity. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I’m only in my twenties and still young, with nothing but a ton of opportunities ahead of me. That thought alone is exciting! Some of the best things I’ve accomplished and experienced so far are just now happening to me, and I’m glad about that. Experiencing things later in life can be great, because it allows time for maturity and development to take place. If I had gotten a lot of the things I’ve obtained now vs. when I was younger, I wouldn’t know how to handle them. Let’s see… I’ve written three books (they’re not published but they were submitted, and in the midst of a sea o...