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Leading Lady

One day I got to thinking about what it means to be a leading lady. Leading lady is a term usually referring to an actress who has the starring and/or lead role in a film or production. In reality, I’ve discovered I’m very much the leading lady in my own life. I have no Hollywood or fame-like aspirations, but when I think about how some of the more non-scandalous actresses in the world carry themselves, on and off-screen, it has inspired and made me examine what it means to be the leading lady in my biggest starring role yet – life. I’ve learned some things I want to share that I’ve gleaned from other leading ladies, and have now implemented in my own life.  I’ve learned…

To Put/Keep God First – If you’re a leading lady, I believe this is something that’s necessary. If you put and keep God front and center of everything you do, you’re setting yourself up to be blessed. I’ve seen what can happen when I’ve gotten arrogant or acted like my way of doing things was better, only quickly to run back to God and put him first where he belongs. This is a very important thing to do.

Less is More – I’m a part of a generation that tends to over share, a lot. I’ve been guilty of it plenty of times, but know that not only is this unwise, but for a leading lady in the public eye, it’s foolish. It’s not good for people to know too much about you, especially during times when you may be broken, hurt, fragile, and very emotional. It’s better to keep these things quiet and within the confines of those that truly love you, that you trust being vulnerable with. Also, who you’re dating, breaking up with, fighting with, a work issue, or any other challenge going on in your life is none of anyone else’s business. It’s best to not post about any of those rough times on any social media platforms. I’ve now made a new rule that my family and love life are off limits. I’m protective and selective of those two things, and I don’t want them exposed to the world in a reckless manner. I see it like this, the less people know about you, the more of an intriguing, mystery you are. The more people know about you, the weaker you become.

Boundaries with Fans and Potential Like/Love Interests – So, most leading ladies have fans. Almost every famous person does, too. And one thing I can see is that, they may appreciate and love their fans, but, most well known people keep them at a careful distance, which is smart. I’ve made the mistake of chillin’ with fan-like people, labeling them as friends, when they were really users, enemies, or opportunists. It took getting my heart broken enough for me to not let too many people have easy access to me, who fell into those categories. I can’t imagine a star being so open to chill with fans like they’d do with their friends, so why would I as a leading lady do it? Also, like/love interests are something to be careful with as well. I’ve done two stupid things a number of times, like…

1) Gave different guys the time of day I had no interest in, because I didn’t want to hurt their feelings.
2) Caught feelings for guys I probably had no business liking in the first place.

Avoiding these two things may seem easy, but, when someone seems to show a genuine interest in you, it’s nice. Knowing the difference between someone who’s really into you for you, and not because of how you look, what your title is, or because of what you bring to the table is key. There’s a huge difference, and while some leading ladies may date or even worse, marry scrubs, I highly recommend having standards and not lowering them for anyone. I believe there are great men in the world, with good hearts and genuine intentions, but there are also creepers, liars, users, and opportunists. It’s wise to be selective.

Have a Small Inner Circle – This is super important. Again, I’ve made the mistake of letting people have access to me that I shouldn’t have. You know, freely giving out my number, had people riding along in my car, shared intimate details of my life… only later to regret it when a fall out happened or I found out that with some of the people I met, had questionable intentions. I have a few close girlfriends I can be my real, open self with, and everyone else is just an acquaintance, social media follower, colleague, or someone I met in passing. Some leading ladies have #squadgoals, but I don’t need all that. Been burned too many times and have found that a nice, small, trustworthy inner circle suites me just fine.

Mindfulness – It’s important to be still sometimes, and just be present and in the moment. Mindfulness is important because it can help you keep perspective and get a grip on reality. Being a leading lady is hard work, because life is hard. While it has its great moments, there are definitely things that happen that can be challenging, so every now and then, I get still and just let myself be mindful. This is also a great meditation technique.

So, to all the leading ladies in the world, keep being fabulous and slaying all day. You’re incredible. 

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