As this current school year is winding down and the pace of things have eased, I’ve had some much-needed quiet time to be still and reflect on my third year as an English educator. And if I could describe this recent school year in one word, that word would be challenging. I’ve often heard that the first year of teaching is the most stressful, and to my surprise, that wasn’t the case for me at all – even when I happened to be juggling grad school and teaching full time my first year. I also have the distinction of working in a Title 1 middle school which primarily consists of working with a demographic of students who are often struggling learners and come from low-income households.
Before accepting the position to teach, I was warned of the challenges that can come with working in a Title 1 middle school with students who don’t have stable (or always safe) living situations, are on elementary school reading levels, don’t always know where their next meal is coming from, are caretakers for their younger siblings, and dealing with a lot of trauma. So there have been some rough days for sure. What’s been interesting though has been seeing some of these same types of students dressed from head to toe in designer clothing, handbags, and almost every pair of Jordan sneakers that have dropped. Many of the girls almost always have their nails and eyelashes done too, which is eye opening considering manicures and eyelash extensions are often considered luxuries vs. priorities. But anyway.
Overall, I enjoy what I do. And I know that teaching is something I’m meant to do. But this role has not been without its difficulties. Currently, I’m the only Black English teacher in my department, which is interesting since I work in a predominantly Black school. Along with this has come some unsettling moments combating racism, biases, and of course, dealing with a few workplace Karens who at times have been careless with their words, actions, and assumptions about Black people and working with minority students and their families. It’s unbelievable that these things are still happening in 2023, but the reality is that there are some people who are content with being ignorant and hateful. I do have a handful of woke colleagues and teacher friends who are mindful of the things they say and do when it comes to race, working with minorities, and at least trying to understand life from perspectives that differ from their own, but in this climate, we’ve still got a long way to go. One of my administrators once told me, “You’re supposed to be an English teacher. It’s so important for our babies to see a teacher who looks like them in front of them.”
However, my presence as the one and only Black English teacher isn’t enough.
The kind of challenges that have come throughout this school year have been enough to make different teachers I know transfer to different schools, leave the teaching field altogether, and have even made some teachers I’ve encountered cry. It’s been a lot. This generation of teenagers and parents is truly unlike anything I’ve ever seen or encountered before, and if things don’t change, I foresee many more talented, intelligent, and effective teachers leaving the field, which means many of the teens we teach will be without a quality education. Which can have serious consequences.
Here’s what I’ve observed…
The defiance, disrespect, and rebellion. I don’t believe all teenagers fall under this category but more of them do than I initially realized. And whenever I’ve encountered or witnessed a rebellious teenager act out, a new level of gratefulness has entered my heart when I think about how fortunate I was to be raised in a two-parent home (which apparently isn’t common for many minority teens), by two parents who didn’t play when I was growing up. Today’s teens are cursing out their parents, their teachers, and even adults they don’t know. Some are picking up guns and murdering and endangering the lives of innocent people. And others are just making bad choices all around. The levels of defiance and disrespect are shocking and tragic. Shocking because I don’t think many teens (or their parents) realize how much their bad attitudes, nastiness, and bad choices will close future doors and opportunities for them later in life. And tragic, because the media has frequently shown what can happen to teens who are defiant, disrespectful, and rebellious. These are certainly praying times. Since teaching, I’ve been praying more than usual, not just for myself and other educators, but for this next generation.
High teacher turnover. In less than a year, two English teachers resigned from my department before the end of our current school year. One seemed stressed and bitter before leaving, and the other was disheartened and disappointed before he bounced. And honestly, I wasn’t surprised. Since their departures, trying to staff the classroom of their former students has been a circus. Things got so bad at one point that four students from that class were transferred to mine in the middle of the year. I had the chance to speak with both teachers who resigned, and the first who left shared that he was leaving the teaching field completely and really seemed to hate some of his students and their parents. He used some strong profanity as he described what some of his encounters had been like. The second teacher shared, “These students are not like anything I’ve ever dealt with before, and I’m done.” He mentioned he was accused of being racist after a misunderstanding happened in one of his bells, and after he was addressed, he didn’t like how things were handled, so he left. When I walked by that same class one day, one of the students said, “Ms. Heard, will you be our teacher? Our other teachers keep leaving us.” Again, high teacher turnover is something that’s increased since the 2020 pandemic and will likely continue until a tremendous shift occurs. Being an educator is not for the faint of heart, so if you’re not a steadfast person, or if teaching isn’t what you believe you’re called to do, it may not be the best field for you.
Purpose. As mentioned before, I pray often. Because being an educator is the calling God’s placed me in for a time such as this one. Some days are tough, however, when I center myself, I understand that my purpose must override my feelings for me to be effective in this role. Being an educator in this climate we’re living in isn’t easy, and it’s not supposed to be. We don’t grow if we’re not challenged, and it's the challenges that remind me to stay the course and to see things through. There’s greatness and purpose on the other side, and I intend to get there. I’m at ease knowing that God wouldn’t give me a task I can’t handle or complete, so as I move through this assignment, I’ll do so with the right heart, the right attitude, and the right spirit.