The Inbox Where Stuff Happens

This generation of men has a different and sometimes unusual approach when it comes to pursuing women. Sliding into a woman’s inbox on social media has become a frequent and familiar way for many seeking relationships to make their move. Sometimes things work out, sometimes they don’t. It’s a risk for sure, but is this really an ideal way to get to know someone? How much do we really know about the people we’re connected to and interacting with? If you pay close attention, most people typically reveal who they are. You can tell a lot about someone from the things they willingly put out or choose not to. One evening, I went through some messages I received from different guys who follow me on Facebook. A lot of them were compliments about my looks, inquiries about my relationship status, and I even received this emoji too – 😍.

While it’s flattering to receive kind messages, I typically don’t get carried away with them. Because while some of the guys who have reached out have honestly been attractive, funny, and charming… I’ve come across (and have even been out with some) who were mean, reckless, and disgusting online and off, interacted with messy women, led lifestyles that conflicted with mine, and didn’t have the best intentions. There was one guy who tried to convince me that he was a Christian after learning of my lifestyle as a Christian too. For all I know, he could have really been about that life. Except I wasn’t too convinced after he tried to proposition me. Which was unsettling. Fortunately, I was smart enough not to get caught up. I met another guy who was relieved to see that I looked the same in person as I did in my photos, which I guess isn’t odd considering how many people filter their photos beyond recognition these days. No shade to anyone who uses them, but if you’re using filters, it’s probably not a bad idea to have photos up without them. That way people know what you really look like.

Facebook, or almost any other social media platform, can be a chill place to meet potenital suitors. Prayerfully people you know or know well through mutual friends. But if you're seeking something real, I recommend connecting with God. Granted, He can move through the world of social media and your inbox, but unfortunately, a lot of what's out there isn't always as real as people think. While it's nice to be open, it's naive to assume that everyone you meet is worthy of your time, energy, or attention. You don't want or need anyone or anything in your life that will complicate it. So be wise, remain prayerful, and discerning.

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Making Waves