It’s interesting how an unexpected pandemic can bring things into perspective.
Even weirder, is hearing from people you barely know, don’t talk to anymore, or haven’t talked to in a long time during this bizarre and uncertain season we’re all in. Some are using this time to reconnect with familiar faces, reach out to their exes, and maybe some former flings. Others are partaking in some solo time, digital dating, or occasional flirting. And a handful are nesting with whoever they’ve been in a relationship with this whole time.
There are also some guys out there who need to be left on read. For those of you who are not familiar with this, it’s essentially a form of ignoring someone.
It’s a little savage, but very necessary sometimes.
Here’s the thing. If we didn’t work well together the first time (in some cases a second time… maybe even a third 😑) and decided to part ways, why would a pandemic prompt you to suddenly want to reach out? Especially if we haven’t seen, talked, or kept in touch with each other in months? Maybe even years. I get that life gets busy, but if you like someone and claim to care about them and want to be with them, then keeping in touch should have been a priority before the pandemic hit. Not during. And definitely not after either. When I had low self-esteem and didn’t think I deserved better, I’d get so excited whenever I’d hear from a guy I met and liked. Even if he was inconsistent and only hit me up whenever he wanted. And that was disappointing and emotionally draining. But me being me, and giving second chances, would still respond when I was contacted because I didn’t want to seem rude or mean. Now?
I don’t do that anymore.
I have to think about what’s best for me. And so do you. I believe in letting people move on. Sometimes what’s best for you is moving on and maintaining your distance from anyone you already know isn’t good for you or God’s best for you. This doesn’t mean they’re a bad person or that you should feel bad or guilty for moving on, protecting your heart, your space, your peace, and most importantly, the one thing you can never get back – your time. You may also want to consider revisiting your boundaries and think about using those unfollow and block features on social media and your phone settings if and as needed.
Don’t allow your loneliness to lead you into making decisions you might regret. This pandemic is seasonal and will pass.
Stay away from guys you know are toxic. Also, please don't be that girl who creeps on some dude's social media. Don't clock his moves or creep on his new girlfriend, fiancee, or wife's page either. I can promise you that doing those things won't make you feel better. Just move on. Don't post long and emotionally driven paragraphs or cryptic posts about a guy you're no longer involved with to prove a point. It's not worth it. Move all the way on. Even if he's childish and tries to provoke you. I've personally learned not to respond to everything. You have to get to the point where you know who and what to ignore. Refuse to allow petty people and the things they post, say, or do get to you. You're better than that. Take the high road, stay safe, and keep it moving.