Lately, I’ve been thinking.
We don’t always need to speak or share or post everything that’s on our minds. Especially on social media.
Certain things about our lives, relationships, major milestones, jobs, career opportunities, and moves, don’t always need to go public. Yet we live in a world that shares, announces, and sometimes even foolishly overshares certain things that, honestly, are no one else’s business but our own or best kept offline and only shared with those who can be trusted.
I can usually tell when a couple may be experiencing trouble in paradise. Mostly because one of the two parties involved will usually post cryptic or incredibly personal things about the state of their shaky relationship. I’ve watched other couples overcompensate with floods of emotional posts and pictures about how happy and lucky they are to be with their significant other, when truthfully, a breakup was approaching, their significant other wanted out of the relationship or was cheating on them. I’ve found that the couples I know who post little to nothing about their love life and keep their relationship private are usually much happier. I’ve been (and have remained) a trusted confidant for different couples in the best and worst sides of these situations, so I know what’s up. And I can also speak from experience: dating off the grid is cool. You get the chance to know someone without other people feeling as if they can comment or dissect what you and someone else have going on.
I can tell when someone practically hates their job and isn’t particularly fond of some of their co-workers, employers, or employees, because I’ve seen constant rants, complaints, and posts about different people not wanting to go to work, calling out of work, and recklessly posting about how they’re either looking for a new job or planning to quit their current position. I’ve found that even if you’re not thrilled about your current job, it’s best not to post or complain about things like your place of employment, an annoying co-worker, a micromanaging manager, a new policy you’re upset about, how you’re planning to quit or anything regarding a new opportunity you’re being interviewed for. I assure you that the things you don’t like about your job and the people you work with who are doing things to get under your skin don’t matter as much as you think. Why not move strategically, submit your two weeks notice, and then leave on a professional note without burning any bridges?
I can tell when someone may be in their feelings or reacting to a petty diss or insult because some of the stuff I see up and down my social media newsfeed on a regular basis, is often filled with emotionally heightened status updates, anger, frustration, despair, and plenty of other things that are mean-spirited and unkind.
You don’t need to announce, post, and tell everything. You don’t need to respond to everything either.
Do you really want to be that person constantly posting about your love life, your job, exposing your next move, ranting about the mother or father of your child that you’re no longer with or may not get along with, which political candidate you don’t like, and going public with stuff that should be private?
Or would you rather be the kind of person who uses your social media platform for good? To be positive and uplifting. Perhaps even encouraging and inspiring. I believe it’s okay to share some things, but not everything, because everyone doesn’t need to know everything about you.
Everyone’s messed up and we’ve all made mistakes and, at different times, may have posted or shared things we should have kept to ourselves, but as long as you’re still living, you can choose to improve and do better. More people are paying attention to you than you think. Exercise some self-control and keep some stuff to yourself. It would be upsetting to get fired, risk losing present and future opportunities, get broken up with, or damage valuable relationships because of something you posted when your emotions were turned up.
Even when you’re upset, having a bad day, or having a bad moment during your day… choose to be kind and smart online.
You’ve got this.