Skip to main content

Rejoice In Being Unchosen

I had a choice. I could get salty and remain upset about what happened, or I could rejoice in being unchosen. At the end of last year, I was struggling with disappointment in my professional life. At work, an announcement was made about different people being promoted. And I wasn’t chosen. Some of my colleagues were surprised I wasn’t. Strangely, I was too. When the news broke, I believed not being chosen somehow devalued who I was as an employee. However, I couldn’t have been more wrong.

John 13:7 reads, “Jesus replied, “You don’t realize now what I am doing. But later you will understand.”  

Slowly but surely, I was beginning to understand. I got myself together and congratulated almost everyone I knew who was promoted, even those who were rubbing it in. Although the way things went down felt cruel and unfair, I knew celebrating others was the right thing to do. I felt foolish for allowing myself to wallow in self-pity and self-doubt, for months, about not being chosen. I spoke with other colleagues who were unchosen too. A number of them had a hard time processing what happened. They were (and still are) well educated, respectable, professional, hard-working, and strongly qualified individuals, who would make exceptional leaders. I also learned a number of them had been overlooked for promotions for years. As I sat with what happened, listened to their stories, and made some observations, I learned: 

·     A title doesn’t make you something you’re not, it just enhances who you already are.
·     You have value no matter what. Your value is not based on a title, position, amount of income, or someone’s inability to recognize your value. 
·     Often, there’s protection in being unchosen for certain things. 
·     What God has in store for you goes far beyond what you think or could ever imagine, even when things don’t make sense at first. 
·     And how you treat people, especially as you rise to the top, matters. Arrogance stumbles. Humbleness soars.

There will be times when people are chosen and promoted over you who are not as qualified as you are or have worked, sacrificed, and given as much as you have. It happens. But if you got a promotion or opportunity not meant for you, it would likely make you miserable and unhappy and delay what God really has in store for you. In the past, I’ve trained new people who ended up in higher roles and positions I was in, and while that was disheartening and humiliating to experience, it led me to seek God’s will concerning my path. 

Rejoice in being unchosen. 

God may be protecting and redirecting you towards future opportunities that align with your true callings and gifts. As hard as it might be at times, you have to trust Him and move through the process. One of my prayers has been, Lord, I don’t want anything that’s not mine. That prayer is aimed at all areas of my life: career opportunities, new roles, friendships, dating, any kind of connections or relationships, and anything else that involves me or my time. Try saying that prayer for your own life too and see how things start shifting and falling in place. God’s the one in charge. Even when things don’t go as you hoped. Again, rejoice in being unchosen. As a matter of fact, celebrate it. Because it’s a refreshing reminder God is guiding you beyond where you’re at. Which is an indication that some amazing and exciting things are on the horizon for you! 

You don’t have to force, manipulate, or plead your way into positions or opportunities that are already yours. Do your best, aim high, and work hard but know that what’s meant for you can never be taken by someone else. What’s not meant for you will pass you by. Your hard work, faithfulness, and commitment will be valued and appreciated and won’t be overlooked by the people, places, and positions already lined up for you. Be encouraged, keep grinding, and shine. You’ve got this. 


*The photo above is from one of my favorite films called Bruce Almighty. It’s a hilarious comedy starring Jim Carrey that hits home on this particular topic. If you need a good laugh and some encouragement, it’s the perfect film for the job. Enjoy! 

Popular posts from this blog

A Year Of Being Ghosted

Ghosting: the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. I’ve been ghosted by every guy I’ve met within the past two years. About  six  to be exact. ·        The first guy pursued me and then got shady whenever I asked him about what he did for a living and where he lived. When he started dodging and avoiding questions, wouldn’t initiate dates, and slowly stopped keeping in touch with me altogether, eventually, all communication ceased. ·        The second guy was someone I met through a family member. He was super cool, very smart, handsome, and funny, but didn’t want to be in a relationship and acted like he didn’t want to be seen with me publicly. When we had plans to meet for an outing, he didn’t show up, and then texted me about a week later with an apology. We chilled at my place a few times, had a few phone conversations, and exchanged occasional texts, but eventually he stopped responding to me

Teacher Table Talk: When Parents Attack

As an English teacher, a core belief I’ve held close since the beginning of my career has been the importance of relationship building. I believe that if great relationships between teachers, students, and parents are established at the beginning of the school year, everything else will fall into place. Authentically modeling, practicing, and establishing mutually respectful and professional relationships within my classroom has been the bridge for effective communication, solid classroom management, and creating a safe and effective learning environment that fits each of my student’s needs.  And though I’ve seen and experienced the benefits of great relationship building, unfortunately, there have been times when some students and parents have not been receptive or interested in my efforts to establish connections that would best serve all parties involved. I’ve also noticed and shared spaces with other educators, school counselors, and administrators who’ve experienced the same. And

How To Respond To A Nasty Email

Technology has made many people bold, rude, and incredibly messy. Often to the point where some may hide behind words they’ve typed instead of verbally communicating a message they want to convey. Such can be the case when it comes to sending emails. Ah, emails. You know what they are. Electronic messages that can be quickly drafted, sent, and misinterpreted (because you can’t always interpret tones or emotions through them). Which is why it’s key to know how to respond to nasty emails if they should ever come your way – especially in the workplace.       As a working professional, there have been plenty of times when a coworker or superior sent an email my way that was petty, mad disrespectful, and unprofessional. And before I learned how to properly utilize email etiquette, my first instinct would always be to clap back. I just felt the need to respond and to communicate that I wouldn’t allow anyone, no matter who they were, to disrespect me. And while I haven’t taken things too far