Natural Hair Photo Diary

I’ve been natural since October 2014. My journey through the natural hair world has been filled with highs and lows, but I’m finally easing into a space where I’m enjoying the ride and falling in love with different styles and ways of wearing my hair. In the black community, particularly with black women, hair is a big deal. When I got box braids for the first time, I was honestly nervous about wearing them in professional settings and in environments where many non-minorities weren’t used to seeing the style. Although I felt beautiful with braids, I’d read and heard some horrifying stories involving women of color being discriminated against, sent home from work, or heavily judged because of their natural hairstyles. When I wore my braids, I picked up on some weird vibes from certain people, got awkward stares, and at the same time, received compliments from others. When I was between styles and wore my natural Afro, I really felt I was shunned, mishandled, and treated funny. Especially in professional settings and during job interviews. I thought maybe I was trippin’ when it kept happening, but I wasn’t imagining things. Whenever I didn’t get certain opportunities, I just knew I’d be great at and was qualified for, I couldn’t shake an unsettling feeling that it had something to do with the way I looked and how I wore my hair. I was even told by someone that I should wear my hair “straighter” to be treated better 😳 Crazy right? It’s sad that these kinds of things happen, but it’s real. This whole idea about diversity, equality, and equal opportunity is not always a reality for minorities. Especially for black women and for anyone else who finds themselves on the receiving end of any kind of prejudice or discrimination. You can have a great education, a sizeable amount of experience under your belt, and have a lot of skills, passion, and motivation to bring to the table and still get overlooked, passed over, and discriminated against because of the way you look. I wear my hair how I like to wear it and I’m good with natural hairstyles that make me feel good. I’m happy to see more and more women of color stepping out with their natural styles and doing so confidently and unapologetically. Going natural has been a movement. There’s so much versatility that comes with being natural and some great stories behind each style. That said, I thought it’d be fun to do a photo diary of different styles I’ve worn since going natural. I’ve done some of my own styles, experimented with protective styles, enlisted help from my mom with styling, worn my hair silky straight, got professionally done braids and sew-ins from talented and highly skilled hair stylists, and again, have sported my own Afro puff too. The journey continues…

The Day I Became A Kidney Donor

About a year ago, I had a dream my dad wanted to talk to our family about something serious. I wasn’t sure what he wanted to discuss, but I knew it was something I needed to prepare myself for. Around the time after I had this dream, I remember stopping by my parents place and sensing something was going on that they weren’t telling me. I tried to dismiss what I’d been feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. Something serious was happening. As I returned to my home after visiting them one day, I was in my kitchen washing dishes when a heaviness hit my heart like nothing I’d ever felt before. Something’s wrong with dad. That’s what that dream was about. God, what’s going on? As I continued washing dishes, I started crying and praying. Then in mid-spring, my dad held an unexpected family meeting that would change all our lives forever. He hesitated at first, and as his voice started cracking and he started crying, he said, “Well, I wanted to talk to ya’ll to tell you that I have kidney disea...

I’m Glad I’m Not Married

When I was about five years old, I was sitting in the backseat of my dad’s car when me, him, my older cousin (my aunt’s son), and my aunt (my dad’s sister) caught my aunt’s fiancé with another woman. My dad had been driving my aunt out to run some errands since she didn’t have a driver’s license or a car. When she spotted her man with another woman, she told my dad to pull the car over, got out of the car, and immediately addressed him. She wanted the keys back to her apartment and was done with him. The other woman she caught her fiancé with slapped him when she realized what was happening, and that was that. When my aunt returned to the car, she was clearly and understandably upset, and the ride back to her place was quiet. Although I was too young to fully grasp what was happening at the time, I knew it wasn’t good. And now, at 34 years old, I can’t imagine how much pain she was in. Her wedding had been planned and paid for – and she never made it down the aisle. My aunt was a beaut...

Dear Young Black Professionals

As you embark on your career, I want you to know some things and stay woke about what you’ll be up against. Please understand that no matter what, you have value, and you matter. Always remember that. As progressive as this world and different workplaces may seem, every workplace has a culture. You’ll be in different places where a lot of people who don’t look like you will be in the room. But know that you belong in those rooms too. Spend some time observing and studying those spaces and learn as much as you can. There will be people you work with who will make presumptions about your competence, education, and ability to fulfill your job duties. There will be more who will think less of you because of the color of your skin and try to disqualify you the moment you make an error, mistake, or ask questions about things you may not understand. This will all feel uncomfortable and you may get insecure, feel like you’re all by yourself, and think you don’t belong there, but ride it out...

Making Waves