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Everybody Messes Up

I’ve made mistakes, messed up, and done a handful of stupid things. I believe at one point or another, everyone has. It’s just important to learn from bad decisions and do your best to avoid making the same mistakes over and over again. I recently had a conversation with my mother about some poor decisions I made in my early twenties, how badly I felt about them, and how I could have handled things better. After listening, she casually responded, “Well, those things you did aren’t uncommon for someone in their twenties.” She didn’t judge me. Condemn me. Or make me feel ashamed. I’m massively blessed to have two great parents who’ve loved me unconditionally even when I’ve messed up. If you have parents or a parent or parental figure who loves you the same way, you’re blessed. Don’t take them for granted. I used to be the kind of Christian that prided myself on walking a straight and narrow path. Striving for perfection and being labeled or perceived as a perfectionist from different people really got me going. As long as I didn’t mess up too badly or was involved with anything or anyone wild and paid my tithes and went to church on a regular basis and committed to serving others and went to worship services and smiled and said and did the right things and played the role of being a good Christian girl who rarely, if ever, got caught up, I really believed I was doing things the “right way.” That kind of thinking and mindset is unhealthy and can be problematic for anyone. Especially a Christian. It’s also arrogant and can set the stage for some epic, humiliating, and humbling downfalls. The right things I did weren’t bad, but my heart wasn’t always in the right place. Doing good things and good works and being a good person doesn’t mean much if your heart isn’t in the right place. I was fine as long as I wasn’t messing up. Until… I started messing up. And whenever I made a mistake, messed up, or did something dumb I’d lay low for a bit and be filled with shame, guilt, and embarrassment. What. Were. You. Thinking… has been the opening line to a lot of my introspection. One of the things I love about God is that He too loves us all unconditionally. No matter how badly any of us messes up. Because truthfully? We’ve all messed up and fallen short and have received grace and many chances we didn’t deserve. With another year upon us, I believe it’s important to acknowledge that everyone messes up and to not only learn from our mistakes but to forgive ourselves, forgive others, take accountability for our actions, and not be so quick to judge. Learn something from your mistakes and the areas you’ve messed up and make a decision to improve and do better, so you don’t keep having setbacks and going through the same things over and over again. And don’t keep making excuses for your mess ups and bad behavior either. You will mess up and make mistakes because guess what? You’re a human being, not a perfectionist. But again, aim to improve and do better because you can. One step at a time. One day at a time. You’ve got this. 
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