Racism still exists. Those who deny its existence may be racists themselves or ignorant of the state of today’s world. Either way, the impact of racism is devastating. Especially when it comes to different systems we have in place. As a minority, I’m aware that this isn’t just a “black” issue (as all minorities have likely been on the receiving end of some kind of prejudice or racism) but for the sake of this post, I'm centering on my perspective and observations as a black woman. I've experienced racism, both openly and silently, and when I saw it pour into different Christian environments, I grew upset, angry, and hurt. I’m aware that race was and still is an issue for some people, but as a longtime Christian, I expected better from other believers. After the 2016 presidential election, it appeared increased levels of hatred descended amongst this country along with many different Christian communities in ways I'd never seen or experienced before. A close colleague of mine suggested the election was an excuse for "closest racists" to come out of hiding. Although, were they really in hiding? Prior to 2016 when Barack Obama was in office, racial tensions were still at an increased high and likely even higher, because, despite a sometimes controversial yet scandal-free presidency, a lot of people weren't happy to see him in office. Regardless, the culture, relationships, alliances, and different belief systems following the most recent election only magnified the current racism that had been present all along. I even pretended not to notice how sexist, racist, and hateful some of the friendly acquaintances I had relationships with, were. Pretending not to notice was a coping mechanism because I didn’t want to face reality. The reality was that a number of different people I chilled with, prayed with, and fellowshipped with were not nearly as Jesus-friendly or loving as I thought. Realizing that, felt like a sucker punch to the gut but also turned out to be a good thing too, because it toughened me up in personal and spiritual areas of my life where I’d been weak. Racial tensions and different political affiliations can test your weak spots and bring division and ugliness you never imagined coming. It’s utterly discouraging and heartbreaking but yields an opportunity for growth. But despite any differences or dismantled relationships, I still have faith that things can change for the better. I believe I can be the change I want to see in this world. And so can you, if that’s your choice. When someone makes a racist comment, posts racially offensive things online, handles me or another minority unfairly or poorly because of skin color, uses religion to support their racism, or hides behind politics, I won’t be hateful back. I will exercise self-control, choose my battles wisely, stand my ground, and speak my truth. While I’ve allowed fear to keep me silent in the past, I’ve recognized the damage silence can bring. Silence can easily be mistaken as compliance and I can’t allow that. We as a society shouldn’t allow it either. I can’t say for sure if racism will be something that ends completely, but I hope progress to eliminate it will be accomplished someday.
About a year ago, I had a dream my dad wanted to talk to our family about something serious. I wasn’t sure what he wanted to discuss, but I knew it was something I needed to prepare myself for. Around the time after I had this dream, I remember stopping by my parents place and sensing something was going on that they weren’t telling me. I tried to dismiss what I’d been feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. Something serious was happening. As I returned to my home after visiting them one day, I was in my kitchen washing dishes when a heaviness hit my heart like nothing I’d ever felt before. Something’s wrong with dad. That’s what that dream was about. God, what’s going on? As I continued washing dishes, I started crying and praying. Then in mid-spring, my dad held an unexpected family meeting that would change all our lives forever. He hesitated at first, and as his voice started cracking and he started crying, he said, “Well, I wanted to talk to ya’ll to tell you that I have kidney disea...