I used to get upset whenever someone called me bougie. Now? I take it as a compliment. Especially since most of the time the word has been used towards me with the intent to be insulting. The Urban Dictionary definition of bougie describes bougie as “aspiring to be a higher class than one is…” Bougie is also often associated with words like “fancy”, “uppity”, and “classy”, all of which I’ve been called a handful of times. I’m also a Christian. Because of those two things, along with the fact that I’m a kind human being, are misconceptions that I’m “too nice” and won’t stand my ground, along with having the authenticity of my blackness constantly questioned. Ridiculous as it is, I’ve been dealing with these things for awhile. However, don’t let the bougie or Christianity fool you. Truthfully, I am a little bougie. I like nice things, enjoy being cultured, educated, and opening myself up to different and higher experiences and I sometimes wish my fellow brothers and sisters of color were just as open without being judgmental and standoffish about things. I can fellowship with the Lord all week and enjoy an HBCU step show. I can clock into the office and turn up after hours. I can vibe to John Mayer and shuffle my playlist with some Drake and Kendrick Lamar, and still worship and praise the Lord with some Fred Hammond and throwback music from the Winans family. I can appreciate and date black men as well as different men from all kinds of racial backgrounds and ethnicities. I can rock my natural locks and still switch up with braids and sew-ins. I can read F. Scott Fitzgerald and still quote episodes from the 90s hit series (and one of my all-time favorites) Martin. I’m still an authentic black woman who deals with the same ups, downs, trials, challenges, prejudices and racism that my other brothers and sisters of color deal with on a regular basis. Being bougie, Christian, well educated, highly qualified, chosen, intelligent, or attractive doesn't change that reality. I won't forget where I came from but I also won't lose sight of where I'm going. There's an enormous world out there waiting to be explored and it's only as small or large as you decide to perceive it. The choice is yours.
As you embark on your career, I want you to know some things and stay woke about what you’ll be up against. Please understand that no matter what, you have value, and you matter. Always remember that. As progressive as this world and different workplaces may seem, every workplace has a culture. You’ll be in different places where a lot of people who don’t look like you will be in the room. But know that you belong in those rooms too. Spend some time observing and studying those spaces and learn as much as you can. There will be people you work with who will make presumptions about your competence, education, and ability to fulfill your job duties. There will be more who will think less of you because of the color of your skin and try to disqualify you the moment you make an error, mistake, or ask questions about things you may not understand. This will all feel uncomfortable and you may get insecure, feel like you’re all by yourself, and think you don’t belong there, but ride it out...