Weary in Worrying

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” - Matthew 6:25-27

People worry – a lot. I have before too. Sometimes the storms and trials of life make it hard not to. And no matter how much of a believer you are and how much faith you have, life has a way of testing you in areas that can prompt you to enter panic mode and start worrying, and that, my dear readers, is exhausting. I’ve been weary in worrying about things that either don’t turn out as awful as I thought they would or don’t end up happening at all. Then I think about the wasted time I spent worrying and get mad about that wasted time I’ll never get back. I believe God thinks it’s kind of funny to watch us do this, especially since He’s in control and can swoop in without notice and ease whatever it is that’s prompted unnecessary worry. Worrying is a waste of time because it’s focusing on something that hasn’t even happened yet. God instructs us in His word to not worry, so if you are worried about something, knock it off. God’s got you no matter what happens.

Thoughts From a Black Educator: Qualified, Credentialed, and Constantly Undermined

I’m a Black educator in my fifth year of teaching middle school English, and in my third as the 8th Grade English PLC (Professional Learning Community) Lead. And while I genuinely enjoy the purposeful work I get to do, seeing the growth of my scholars, and continuing to hone my skills in a content area I’ve loved since I was a little girl, I’ve had to confront some unpleasant experiences in this space. I’d been through much worse when I was an academic advisor at a Christian university. Racism, sexism, harassment, and workplace bullying were sadly norms in that environment. However, some of what I’ve experienced as a Black educator hasn’t been normal … It doesn’t seem normal to be the only Black educator in my department – in a predominantly Black school. One of my Black colleagues once said, “It should look like a Tyler Perry movie in here.” But it doesn’t. It didn’t feel normal being reprimanded in a meeting (during my second year of teaching) by an administrator who went in on...

Ditching Dating And Decentering Men

Today’s current dating climate is bizarre. It’s grown so bizarre, that men barely, if ever in some cases, will approach a woman in person and ask her out on a date. Instead, the new normal has become DM sliding, creeping on social media accounts, and liking photos to build romantic connections, which honestly doesn’t sound too romantic or appealing to me at all. As a child of the 90s and a teenager of the early 2000s, I miss and prefer the time when men interacted with women without hiding behind technology. There was something special about handwritten cards and notes, thoughtful dates, serendipity, and intentionality. After having some unpleasant encounters, embarrassing moments, and failed set ups (from well meaning people who believe I need to be partnered), I’ve decided, that now, at 36, to choose me. I’m ditching dating and decentering men. I’m no longer interested in meeting anyone, dating, or creating space to prioritize a relationship. I’ve never been a male-centered woman any...

He’s Not Going To Marry You, Sis

About a year ago, a thirty-something-year-old revealed to me that he didn’t want to marry his girlfriend. He explained how they traveled together, how much she turned him on, and that she was a single mother. He also described her as a non-ambitious woman. While he doesn’t have kids of his own and doesn’t want to start a family until he’s married, he made it clear that his girlfriend isn’t “the one.” When I asked him if he wanted to marry her, the room fell completely silent. Her child from a previous relationship is what makes him hesitant. He went on to share that he still doesn’t know what he wants and that he’s not into having a blended family. However, he’s dating a single mother who I imagine has no idea he feels this way. One of his married friends told him, “I know you’re sleeping with this girl and hanging out with her, but if you’re not going to marry her, you need to break up with her.” I even warned him that he may end up getting got if he’s not careful… but he doesn’t thin...

Making Waves