Microphone Check

I stood up to you and you tried to destroy me. When I stand up for myself and for others afraid to speak, I’m viewed as a threat that must be silenced and destroyed, right? Wrong. I was scared, but I spoke up anyway. Taking the high road isn’t always easy when it comes to people like you. I know you tried to poison my name to others, and eventually those others learned the things you said about me weren’t true. Trying to destroy me was never going to make you more powerful. It only magnified that you were wrong about me all along. But I forgive you. When I tried to get help, I felt outnumbered. That was lonely, massively painful, and scary. Know what happens when people are scared of people like you? They stay silent. What's troubling is that often, when things like this happen, many people will watch you get attacked and say nothing. I forgive them, though. And I still forgive you. For awhile I thought something was wrong with me because you thought I didn’t belong when really you were the one with the problem. People like you… people like you… people like you are the reason why people stay away from churches and avoid the Christian community all together. I’ve seen people crying in secret and heard the stories people are afraid to bring forward. It’s incredible how horrible things can happen in beautiful places. I still forgive you, though.

But it wasn’t just you…

To the one who criticized my clothing

To the one who publically humiliated me

To the one who looked me in the face and pretended I wasn’t there

To the one who got jealous and stopped talking to me when the guy choose me, instead of her

To the one I was supposed to build with that never followed through

To the one who looked down on me

To the ones who were supposed to be my friends

To the ones I thought were my friends

To the people in places I went to for sanctuary that were scarring

And to all the ones who think and claim I embarrass the Kingdom… I forgive you all.

I don’t want an apology and I don’t need one. I’ve made my peace. I just don’t want what happened to me to happen to anyone else. I don’t have anything to prove to you or anyone else. I never did. I still have value. And most importantly, I know who I am. I won’t let people like you steal my joy, kill my spirit, or make me believe there still isn’t goodness in this fallen world. There’s enough room for all kinds of people to sit at the table, even when people like you don’t think so. I stayed quiet, held back, and was afraid to breathe a word about this. But I know my God and I don’t have to choose fear. I choose freedom.

-You didn’t ruin me.

The Day I Became A Kidney Donor

About a year ago, I had a dream my dad wanted to talk to our family about something serious. I wasn’t sure what he wanted to discuss, but I knew it was something I needed to prepare myself for. Around the time after I had this dream, I remember stopping by my parents place and sensing something was going on that they weren’t telling me. I tried to dismiss what I’d been feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. Something serious was happening. As I returned to my home after visiting them one day, I was in my kitchen washing dishes when a heaviness hit my heart like nothing I’d ever felt before. Something’s wrong with dad. That’s what that dream was about. God, what’s going on? As I continued washing dishes, I started crying and praying. Then in mid-spring, my dad held an unexpected family meeting that would change all our lives forever. He hesitated at first, and as his voice started cracking and he started crying, he said, “Well, I wanted to talk to ya’ll to tell you that I have kidney disea...

I’m Glad I’m Not Married

When I was about five years old, I was sitting in the backseat of my dad’s car when me, him, my older cousin (my aunt’s son), and my aunt (my dad’s sister) caught my aunt’s fiancé with another woman. My dad had been driving my aunt out to run some errands since she didn’t have a driver’s license or a car. When she spotted her man with another woman, she told my dad to pull the car over, got out of the car, and immediately addressed him. She wanted the keys back to her apartment and was done with him. The other woman she caught her fiancé with slapped him when she realized what was happening, and that was that. When my aunt returned to the car, she was clearly and understandably upset, and the ride back to her place was quiet. Although I was too young to fully grasp what was happening at the time, I knew it wasn’t good. And now, at 34 years old, I can’t imagine how much pain she was in. Her wedding had been planned and paid for – and she never made it down the aisle. My aunt was a beaut...

How To Respond To A Nasty Email

Technology has made many people bold, rude, and incredibly messy. Often to the point where some may hide behind words they’ve typed instead of verbally communicating a message they want to convey. Such can be the case when it comes to sending emails. Ah, emails. You know what they are. Electronic messages that can be quickly drafted, sent, and misinterpreted (because you can’t always interpret tones or emotions through them). Which is why it’s key to know how to respond to nasty emails if they should ever come your way – especially in the workplace. As a working professional, there have been plenty of times when a coworker or superior sent an email my way that was petty, mad disrespectful, and unprofessional. And before I learned how to properly utilize email etiquette, my first instinct would always be to clap back. I just felt the need to respond and to communicate that I wouldn’t allow anyone, no matter who they were, to disrespect me. And while I haven’t taken t...

Making Waves