The Devil Wears Khakis

Inevitably in life, you’ll eventually work with people you don’t like. It happens. Different personalities are bound to clash, however, if you intend to make the most of your time and be a non-irritated professional, being cordial is a must.

At work I’m really quiet, unless I’m consulting with someone. I’m also a great listener and observer, which means I tend to catch things that most people overlook or miss, because they’re not paying close attention. I notice who’s well liked and who’s not, who shares too much about their personal life and those who are more reserved, and I can easily identify who can be trusted and who can’t.

One of the best tips I got from a seasoned co-worker was: It’s best to just keep people on a need to know basis. And that was something I immediately grasped about a month on the job.

In any work setting the culture and people combined, help set the tone. Accessing the environment, culture (the rules), people (those who are liked or not well liked) and figuring out how you should approach challenging situations, while working with people you may not take a liking to or vice versa, will serve you well.

I often reflect on T.D. Jakes tips on how to carry one’s self in the workplace (see the list below.) I hope you find them as resourceful as I have. Be blessed.

1. Understand that God anoints you for trouble.
2. Don't expect to be appreciated.
3. Do your job well, but remember your mission.
4. Seek opportunities to change the atmosphere without commenting on the problems.
5. Don't let your environment get inside of you.
6. Increase your capacity to work with different personalities.
7. Remember where you are does not define where you are going.
8. Get the optimum results with minimal confusion.
9. Don't be associated with one group or clique.
10. Always keep your song near you.

Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work – 1 Thessalonians 4:11

The Day I Became A Kidney Donor

About a year ago, I had a dream my dad wanted to talk to our family about something serious. I wasn’t sure what he wanted to discuss, but I knew it was something I needed to prepare myself for. Around the time after I had this dream, I remember stopping by my parents place and sensing something was going on that they weren’t telling me. I tried to dismiss what I’d been feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. Something serious was happening. As I returned to my home after visiting them one day, I was in my kitchen washing dishes when a heaviness hit my heart like nothing I’d ever felt before. Something’s wrong with dad. That’s what that dream was about. God, what’s going on? As I continued washing dishes, I started crying and praying. Then in mid-spring, my dad held an unexpected family meeting that would change all our lives forever. He hesitated at first, and as his voice started cracking and he started crying, he said, “Well, I wanted to talk to ya’ll to tell you that I have kidney disea...

I’m Glad I’m Not Married

When I was about five years old, I was sitting in the backseat of my dad’s car when me, him, my older cousin (my aunt’s son), and my aunt (my dad’s sister) caught my aunt’s fiancé with another woman. My dad had been driving my aunt out to run some errands since she didn’t have a driver’s license or a car. When she spotted her man with another woman, she told my dad to pull the car over, got out of the car, and immediately addressed him. She wanted the keys back to her apartment and was done with him. The other woman she caught her fiancé with slapped him when she realized what was happening, and that was that. When my aunt returned to the car, she was clearly and understandably upset, and the ride back to her place was quiet. Although I was too young to fully grasp what was happening at the time, I knew it wasn’t good. And now, at 34 years old, I can’t imagine how much pain she was in. Her wedding had been planned and paid for – and she never made it down the aisle. My aunt was a beaut...

Twenty Pieces Of Advice & Wisdom For The Twenty-Something Women Of The World

Years ago, a friend of mine asked me for advice regarding a life change she was considering. She explained her situation and shared, “I wanted to talk to you because you give really good advice.” I was flattered and surprised by her statement. Mostly because while I’ve been approached by family, friends, colleagues, different students I teach, and sometimes even strangers who have asked me for advice regarding whatever it was they happened to bring my way, some haven’t always listened and then proceeded to make regretful decisions that could have been avoided if they had listened to what I shared in the first place. And lately, a group that’s heavily been on my heart and mind are women in their twenties. I’m only 33 but I remember what it was like for my friends and me moving through our twenties. It wasn’t the easiest decade to navigate, and it certainly had its ups and downs, but armed with the experiences, advice, and wisdom I have now, there are definitely things I believe we ...

Making Waves