Natural Hair Diaries

In October 2014 I made the decision to go natural. This wasn’t an easy choice but it had to be done. I’d been getting relaxers in my hair since I was seven, and the damage finally caught up to me when my hair started breaking off. For years, I had friends trying to get me to go natural but the thought of not having my hair relaxed and straightened was non-negotiable. I also thought I’d have to do the BC (big chop), which is a process where one has all of their damaged hair cut off all the way down to its most natural state. And I definitely wasn’t comfortable doing that.

I did finally quit the relaxers but tried to be slick by still getting my hair pressed straight, acting as if heat damage wasn’t that big of a deal. Prior to my hair falling out and being damaged, I’d spend hours and lots of money every month going to the beauty shop. I was getting to the point where I was tired of spending so much money, not to mention sitting through lengthy and mostly late appointments, when I decided, enough was enough. The final straw was when I literally waited over an hour for my stylist at the time to do my hair, after I’d already scheduled an appointment the week prior to seeing her. When I explained my desire to go natural, she didn’t seem thrilled. I also told her that my hair was falling out. I found out later that when most women go natural, they usually stop going to the salon. I suppose she was upset because she probably knew I’d eventually stop coming, but my health and hair were at risk.

Once I stopped going I did save money, but I wasn’t ready for the world of testing different natural hair products, trying new hairstyles I could maintain, and figuring out what to do. I’ve always had help or a professional stylist do my hair, so, things got complicated. After a ton of mishaps, twists, turns, and a trip to a new stylist in the fall of 2016 who cut off a lot of my hair (more that I was mentally prepared for) I stopped using heat all together and have been working towards being patient until the beautiful curl pattern I was naturally born with, reemerges. I’ve even experimented with braids, which is something I never thought I’d do again (I had them before as a kid) and I love having them now. They’ve changed my look and have made things easier as I’ve gone through transitioning. Natural hair is beautiful. It does take a lot of upkeep, but it’s better than damaging it with chemicals that ruin it. When I see old photos of myself with my straightened hair, I don’t look too happy. My hair was always straightened and in my face, so now that it’s natural, it’s often pulled back and I feel more beautiful than ever. Going natural was worth it.

A Year Of Being Ghosted

Ghosting: the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. I’ve been ghosted by every guy I’ve met within the past two years. About six to be exact. · The first guy pursued me and then got shady whenever I asked him about what he did for a living and where he lived. When he started dodging and avoiding questions, wouldn’t initiate dates, and slowly stopped keeping in touch with me altogether, eventually, all communication ceased. · The second guy was someone I met through a family member. He was super cool, very smart, handsome, and funny, but didn’t want to be in a relationship and acted like he didn’t want to be seen with me publicly. When we had plans to meet for an outing, he didn’t show up, and then texted me about a week later with an apology. We chilled at my place a few times, had a few phone conversations, and exchanged occasional texts, but eventually he stopped responding to me

Teacher Table Talk: When Parents Attack

As an English teacher, a core belief I’ve held close since the beginning of my career has been the importance of relationship building. I believe that if great relationships between teachers, students, and parents are established at the beginning of the school year, everything else will fall into place. Authentically modeling, practicing, and establishing mutually respectful and professional relationships within my classroom has been the bridge for effective communication, solid classroom management, and creating a safe and effective learning environment that fits each of my student’s needs. And though I’ve seen and experienced the benefits of great relationship building, unfortunately, there have been times when some students and parents have not been receptive or interested in my efforts to establish connections that would best serve all parties involved. I’ve also noticed and shared spaces with other educators, school counselors, and administrators who’ve experienced the same. And

How To Respond To A Nasty Email

Technology has made many people bold, rude, and incredibly messy. Often to the point where some may hide behind words they’ve typed instead of verbally communicating a message they want to convey. Such can be the case when it comes to sending emails. Ah, emails. You know what they are. Electronic messages that can be quickly drafted, sent, and misinterpreted (because you can’t always interpret tones or emotions through them). Which is why it’s key to know how to respond to nasty emails if they should ever come your way – especially in the workplace. As a working professional, there have been plenty of times when a coworker or superior sent an email my way that was petty, mad disrespectful, and unprofessional. And before I learned how to properly utilize email etiquette, my first instinct would always be to clap back. I just felt the need to respond and to communicate that I wouldn’t allow anyone, no matter who they were, to disrespect me. And while I haven’t taken things too far

Making Waves