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Perception

Perception can be a tricky thing. I believe a lot of people form impressions about others based on what they see, without actually getting a real feel for what someone is all about. Think about it – how many times have you taken a look at someone and sized them up, based on what you saw?


I’ve done it and have had it happen to me plenty of times. I’m usually surprised with some of the impressions formed about me when I encounter people who don’t know me well. Awhile back, when I changed my clothes at work before heading out to grab dinner with a friend, an associate asked, “Where you having dinner, Ruth’s Chris?” “No”, I replied. “I’ve never eaten there before, have you?” When she said she hadn’t either, we parted ways and I went off to dinner with my friend. The encounter made me feel some kind of way, because of the way she came at me with the question. Ruth’s Chris is a popular and expensive restaurant in my area and I’ve never been, nor have a desire to eat there. I don’t even like steak but because of how I was dressed, an impression was formed about me that was incorrect. For the record: I was wearing a crop top and a high-waisted skirt, hardly a fancy look (even though I did look nice that night lol.) Shortly after that incident, I had another encounter when I was approached by a young man one afternoon. He inquired about a necklace I was wearing and asked if it was engraved with a special message. I replied, “No, it just reads, Tiffany & Co.” After I said that, he said, “Oh, fancy. Tiffany’s, that’s expensive. So, you’re the independent type that doesn’t need anyone to buy you nice things. You’ll just get it yourself.” I replied, “I don’t mind getting nice things from someone else, it’s just that this (my necklace) is something I wanted to get for myself.” When he said that, I felt like an impression was made about me because of a material thing like a Tiffany & Co. necklace. I’ve also had things said to me like, you seem like a put-together person, you come off as a perfectionist, you’re fancy, you’re really quiet, and the word bougie has come up plenty of times. While none of these things are insulting, they’re not necessarily things I perceive about myself. Truthfully, I’m as down to earth as they come. I don’t spend a lot of money on clothes or jewelry (the Tiffany & Co. necklace is the most expensive piece of jewelry I’ve ever owned), I don’t think I’m fancy, although, I do like to put effort into how I look whenever I’m stepping out, and I don’t frequently dine at expensive restaurants. But see how wild perception can be? It’s important to be labeled by no one. Labels are limiting. People may think they have you figured out, when they don’t really know you at all. I think it’d be better if people didn’t make impressions based off of surface level visuals. What do you think? 

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