Perception can be a tricky thing. I believe a lot of
people form impressions about others based on what they see, without actually
getting a real feel for what someone
is all about. Think about it – how many times have you taken a look at someone
and sized them up, based on what you saw?
I’ve done it and have had it happen to me plenty of
times. I’m usually surprised with some of the impressions formed about me when
I encounter people who don’t know me well. Awhile back, when I changed my
clothes at work before heading out to grab dinner with a friend, an associate
asked, “Where you having dinner, Ruth’s Chris?” “No”, I replied. “I’ve never
eaten there before, have you?” When she said she hadn’t either, we parted ways
and I went off to dinner with my friend. The encounter made me feel some kind
of way, because of the way she came
at me with the question. Ruth’s Chris is a popular and expensive restaurant in
my area and I’ve never been, nor have a desire to eat there. I don’t even like
steak but because of how I was dressed, an impression was formed about me that
was incorrect. For the record: I was wearing a crop top and a high-waisted
skirt, hardly a fancy look (even though I did look nice that night lol.) Shortly
after that incident, I had another encounter when I was approached by a young man
one afternoon. He inquired about a necklace I was wearing and asked if it was
engraved with a special message. I replied, “No, it just reads, Tiffany & Co.” After I said that, he said, “Oh, fancy. Tiffany’s,
that’s expensive. So, you’re the independent type that doesn’t need anyone to
buy you nice things. You’ll just get it yourself.” I replied, “I don’t mind
getting nice things from someone else, it’s just that this (my necklace) is
something I wanted to get for myself.” When he said that, I felt like an
impression was made about me because of a material thing like a Tiffany &
Co. necklace. I’ve also had things said to me like, you seem like a put-together person, you come off as a perfectionist, you’re fancy, you’re really quiet,
and the word bougie has come up
plenty of times. While none of these things are insulting, they’re not necessarily
things I perceive about myself. Truthfully, I’m as down to earth as they come.
I don’t spend a lot of money on clothes or jewelry (the Tiffany & Co.
necklace is the most expensive piece of jewelry I’ve ever owned), I don’t think
I’m fancy, although, I do like to put
effort into how I look whenever I’m stepping out, and I don’t frequently dine
at expensive restaurants. But see how wild perception can be? It’s important to
be labeled by no one. Labels are limiting. People may think they have you figured out, when they don’t really know you at
all. I think it’d be better if people didn’t make impressions based off of
surface level visuals. What do you think?