As a young woman, I don’t like competing with other
women. I think it’s petty. As much as I try to avoid it, it seems inevitable at
times. I’m in competition with no one but myself, however, I feel the
discomfort and hatred when faced with another woman, who doesn’t try to
challenge me in a healthy way (like going for a job, for example) but instead,
attempts to one up me in a childish manner to prove a point, because she’s either
threatened, or insecure. I don’t like that, and unfortunately I see it all the
time. I’ve adopted a mantra that simply goes, if she wins, I win, we all win. As women, especially young women,
we’re all in different places and roles in our lives ranging from students, to
professionals, mothers, daughters, sisters, spouses, girlfriends, and etc. and
celebrating each other vs. competing with one another, or downplaying another’s
success, regardless of what stage the other is in, can improve. I’ve been to many
weddings, baby showers, and other various events to support my fellow
sisterhood of different family members and friends, but when I graduated from
college and started applying for different career opportunities, I noticed the
silence and discouraging comments that were whispered, and thrown my way. I
learned that there will be people who don’t clap when you’re winning; even
people that you thought would.
Experiencing this really hurt, because while I’m not picking out a wedding gown
or putting a kid on the bus for their first day of school, I’m steady grinding
for a better life, while trying to become a better version of myself. Not only
have I had this happen to me, but some other smart, go-getting, young women I
know, don’t get the support from their family, friends, and other women that
they need, sometimes. Regardless of how independent someone may come off, it doesn’t
dismiss the fact that they should be celebrated and supported, too. I know I
want to be in a position someday, where I’m able to help put young women
through college that want to go, because I want to see them make it in this
world. Remember, if she wins, I win, we
all win. It’d be great if more women supported each other, instead of
competing with one another, or downplaying each other’s wins. We could all get
ahead so much further together, than apart. Hopefully, that day will come.
Ghosting: the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. I’ve been ghosted by every guy I’ve met within the past two years. About six to be exact. · The first guy pursued me and then got shady whenever I asked him about what he did for a living and where he lived. When he started dodging and avoiding questions, wouldn’t initiate dates, and slowly stopped keeping in touch with me altogether, eventually, all communication ceased. · The second guy was someone I met through a family member. He was super cool, very smart, handsome, and funny, but didn’t want to be in a relationship and acted like he didn’t want to be seen with me publicly. When we had plans to meet for an outing, he didn’t show up, and then texted me about a week later with an apology. We chilled at my place a few times, had a few phone conversations, and exchanged occasional texts, but eventually he stopped responding to me