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I’m Breaking Up With You

My mom and I have a running joke about breaking up with each other. We playfully break up whenever one of us is getting on the other’s nerves. I break up with her almost every week, and on different occasions, I’ve accused her of cheating on me whenever she hangs out with someone else. In return, she usually replies, “We’re already broken up.” While this is a joke for us, some people who go through breakups for different reasons may not find things so funny. The joke my mom and I share prompted me to think about different people I’ve broken up with as 2018 is coming to an end, along with different things, habits, and choices I’ve chosen to break up with too. This has been a challenging year. I’ve had some wins, but I’ve definitely taken some L’s (losses) that felt painful, confusing, and awful. Admittingly, my faith in people and quality relationships has dwindled, and honestly, my overall faith feels unsteady these days. I’m working on it, though. I’m still down with the Lord, but I’ve done a lot of reflecting and reevaluating about how and what I the rest of my life to be like and the kind of people I want in it, and prayerfully, things will turn out just fine. Even if there are some breakups along the way. So far, I’ve broken up with:

·     The insecure need to be accepted, approved of, or liked by people who don’t accept or like me as I am.
·     People who aren’t good for me.
·     People who wouldn’t show up for me when I needed them (especially ones I continually showed up for.) 
·     Waiting for certain people and things to be in place before I experience different things I’ve wanted to experience. 
·     Putting different things I want to experience and accomplish on hold for anything or anyone.  
·     Downplaying being a successful and blessed woman because guys who act like boys think I’m too put together, independent, bougie, or a perfectionist. I can’t make this up. I’ve seriously had these things said to me and about me. I won’t apologize for being blessed or successful. Ever.
·     Downplaying being a successful and blessed woman because of petty, jealous, or insecure women or should I say, girls, who don’t know me well or know me at all, and quite frankly, may not know themselves, have an issue with me. Again, I won’t apologize for being blessed or successful. Ever. 
·     Fear of being vulnerable, authentic, and bold with my writing.
·     The illusion of comfort.
·     Timidity and not standing up for myself.

Who or what are you breaking up with this year? 
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