A Reminder To Relax And Enjoy It

Put on a fresh pot of coffee and dress it up however you want to.

Or have some eggnog or tea or hot chocolate with a ton of marshmallows on top. And enjoy it.

Go out (or stay in…) for an amazing breakfast filled with whatever you want to eat. I recommend mimosas, waffles, bacon, eggs, hash browns, pancakes, flaky and buttery croissants, or anything else that sounds good. I also recommend savoring every bite. And enjoying it.

After you eat, put on the most comfy robe or pair of sweats you own, get back in bed, cuddle with your significant other, or your fur baby if you have one, and stream that movie or show you’ve had sitting on your Hulu or Netflix account for months and never had the chance to watch because you’ve been working hard all year. And enjoy it.

After you’ve binged on Hulu or Netflix, fall asleep. Take a nap. And wake up whenever you want. And enjoy it.

Then go through any books or magazines or articles you’ve saved and have wanted to read but just haven’t had the time to check out. And enjoy all of them.

Then remember how blessed you are, and all that you’ve moved through this year, and how unbelievably awesome you are too, and just sit with those thoughts. And do your best to enjoy this time and chill.

You’ve earned this. Enjoy it.

Thoughts From a Black Educator: Qualified, Credentialed, and Constantly Undermined

I’m a Black educator in my fifth year of teaching middle school English, and in my third as the 8th Grade English PLC (Professional Learning Community) Lead. And while I genuinely enjoy the purposeful work I get to do, seeing the growth of my scholars, and continuing to hone my skills in a content area I’ve loved since I was a little girl, I’ve had to confront some unpleasant experiences in this space. I’d been through much worse when I was an academic advisor at a Christian university. Racism, sexism, harassment, and workplace bullying were sadly norms in that environment. However, some of what I’ve experienced as a Black educator hasn’t been normal … It doesn’t seem normal to be the only Black educator in my department – in a predominantly Black school. One of my Black colleagues once said, “It should look like a Tyler Perry movie in here.” But it doesn’t. It didn’t feel normal being reprimanded in a meeting (during my second year of teaching) by an administrator who went in on...

Ditching Dating And Decentering Men

Today’s current dating climate is bizarre. It’s grown so bizarre, that men barely, if ever in some cases, will approach a woman in person and ask her out on a date. Instead, the new normal has become DM sliding, creeping on social media accounts, and liking photos to build romantic connections, which honestly doesn’t sound too romantic or appealing to me at all. As a child of the 90s and a teenager of the early 2000s, I miss and prefer the time when men interacted with women without hiding behind technology. There was something special about handwritten cards and notes, thoughtful dates, serendipity, and intentionality. After having some unpleasant encounters, embarrassing moments, and failed set ups (from well meaning people who believe I need to be partnered), I’ve decided, that now, at 36, to choose me. I’m ditching dating and decentering men. I’m no longer interested in meeting anyone, dating, or creating space to prioritize a relationship. I’ve never been a male-centered woman any...

The Day I Made A Will

When I was a teenager, I remember writing a list of my greatest fears. One of the things I listed was death. Looking back, it was an interesting item to list because inevitably, death is something each of us will face at some point in our lives. Even though it’s no longer a fear of mine, I understand why and how it’s not a comfortable thing for everyone to navigate. But regardless, this past summer I completed a detailed will. I signed it, had witnesses sign it, and got it notarized. As I was getting everything done, one of the witnesses looked at me and said, “You know, it’s just that you’re so young…” I’ve learned that death doesn’t care how young or how old you are. You can be five, fifteen, thirty, or fifty, and it’s still something that happens. Completing my will wasn’t scary. It gave me peace of mind having documentation in place stating my detailed directives and requests. A year ago, I had one of my kidneys removed. It was a surgery that came with risks that were presented cle...

Making Waves