While anyone employed is blessed to have a job and/or career opportunity, many people dread going to work because of an alarming thing called workplace bullying. It’s an unfortunate thing happening in different companies, organizations, and businesses and sadly is something many employees are afraid to speak up about or report or fight. I’ve experienced it in past positions and was scared I’d get in trouble or worse, fired, if I shared that a higher up or another employee did or said something that made me feel uncomfortable or seemed unethical and unprofessional. I once had a supervisor insult me and call me out of my name in front of another co-worker. On another occasion a manager once inquired about my love life, even going as far as making inappropriate sexual remarks and jokes – that particular incident was humiliating but I didn’t report the person even though another colleague at the time encouraged me to do so. A past irate and aggressive co-worker once invaded my personal space after a verbal confrontation and tried to intimidate me by following me after I refused to engage her any longer when she wouldn’t lower her voice as she belittled me in front of other co-workers who were present. And there were a handful of times when I was pressed and pressured to do things I didn’t feel comfortable doing, and threatened to be demoted, excluded, written up, or fired if I didn’t comply. Would you believe I never reported some of these incidents? I got tired of fighting losing battles and actually gave up when I did report a number of them after learning that certain HR departments and different companies won’t have your back. Some HR departments will likely rule in favor of your boss and company vs. your safety and best interest, which I imagine make any employees who’ve experienced any kind of workplace bullying or assault feel uneasy. Some battles will feel like a loss but understand you’re not alone and you do have rights. If you’re experiencing or have experienced any kind of workplace bullying, here’s what you can do:
Say Something. I’ve spoken privately and publicly with different employees in different workplaces and settings who’ve endured humiliation, insults, working unreasonable hours, intimidation, and harassment and never reported their boss or manager or co-worker who bullied them. Bad things get unreported and keep happening because people get scared things will get worse or that they’ll be fired if they speak up. It won’t always be easy but say something. You'll be taking active steps to bring about change, and you can make the ride less bumpy for those following your path.
Document. This is important. Documented accounts of incidents involving any kind of harassment or bullying with detailed notes, dates, and times can be beneficial to presenting your case when it comes time to speak with a higher up, HR, or outside counsel if needed. Your documentation will also help you keep track of things if you notice a pattern of unacceptable behavior.
Get Help. Know when to ask for help and get it. And know HR won’t always have your back. Their job is often to remain neutral in reported workplace incidents and some HR departments will protect the company and its leaders over employers. I know that’s scary, but it happens all the time. If HR can’t or isn’t useful, consider seeking legal representation if needed.
Check In With (Trustworthy) Co-workers. If you’ve experienced any kind of workplace bullying or are currently experiencing it, chances are you’re not the only one. If you can, seek out trustworthy co-workers and encourage them to document things too. There’s strength in numbers.
If Nothing Changes… Move Forward. Sometimes some battles are lost. And if you’ve ever lost and felt defeated and helpless about this, you’re not alone. Unfortunately, some things don’t change. Even bullying in the workplace. If speaking up, documenting, going to HR, and speaking with other co-workers doesn’t help, consider seeking new employment opportunities. And be encouraged while moving forward. Even if things like workplace bullying don’t change where you’ve been, remember, life has a way of righting wrongs. Move forward and be the change you want to see. I hope this information is helpful to those of you who need it.
Also, check out this Forbes article here on workplace bullying. It’s interesting and informative.