I was the only single woman in the room. I talked with couples, smiled at babies, browsed through my phone, and then made my exit. I was at a surprise birthday party for one of my friends, who happens to be married. Her husband reached out to a bunch of us to gather for a small celebration for her birthday. And while in the past, I’d usually avoid these kinds of events, I decided to show up and celebrate my friend. Sometimes some single women get anxious, insecure, or annoyed being amongst those who are coupled off. And I get it. I used to be the same way until I learned how to coexist with couples. I’m no expert, as I’m still navigating this, but I do have some pointers for single bachelorettes trying to find their way in and through the world of couples…
Relax. Being single in the world can be fun for some and daunting for others. But one of the best things you can do is relax and own your current status. Being single can be awesome! And the freedom that comes with it is an incredible blessing. Trust. Your attitude and perspective about your singleness are what makes the difference. You don’t have a reason to be insecure or feel threatened. Especially when it comes to the status of your love life. The couples you might think are judging you or wondering why you’re single, may not care nearly as much as you do. Just be yourself and relax.
Be Confident. When you know who you are, you just know. Some people (especially some overstepping and annoying but well-meaning couples) may sometimes make thoughtless comments regarding your singleness, try to set you up with someone they know (who you have zero interest in), and inquire about your relationship status, but be confident with who you are. Confidence is attractive. Be confident with the way you dress, speak, carry yourself, and how you want to be received by others. I once attended a wedding alone and was nervous to go without having a date. But I moved through my fears and happily arrived at the wedding and still had a good time.
Engage. If you’re heading out to any event, especially one that may involve a lot of couples, be prepared to socialize. Naturally, I’m a quiet person, but I don’t allow that to be an excuse to be standoffish or rude. Talk to people. Some couples are inviting and totally chill. Most of the couples I’ve met looooove showing me pictures of themselves with their significant others, or photos of their newborn babies, or their fur babies, or the new home they’re purchasing and renovating, or enjoy reminding me about how lucky I am to be single 😄. And some super chill couples sometimes have eligible, attractive, and quality single friends they may want to introduce you to, so, why not take them up if interested? Singles can coexist with couples and have a good time. Relax, maintain your confidence, and engage. You’ve got this.